ep. 023 • Why I’m Prioritizing Time Off In 2021

Chelsea: Earlier this month I hosted a vision board party for the Hennapreneur Community over on Facebook. And we spent the afternoon getting clear on our focus and intentions for our lives and businesses in the new year. Today. I'm sharing more about why taking more time off was actually one of the items at the top of my list.

So let's dive right in!

Welcome to the Hennapreneur podcast — the exclusive podcast of its kind dedicated to giving you an honest look at the realities of making a living as a henna professional.

I'm your host Chelsea Stevenson, a tea-loving, shoe-collecting mother of three in constant search for the most poppin' pair of earrings and the perfect shade of red lipstick.

I'm also a professional henna artist and business strategist who went from barely being able to piece together a fluid design to being the owner of the most celebrated henna boutique in my city.

I'm on a mission to help henna professionals to harness their skills and grow vibrant, profitable businesses that they absolutely love.

If you want to make more money with your art, you are definitely in the right place. Let's get to it!

So, oftentimes when we think about our goal planning and especially, you know, at the beginning of the year, there's this energy, there's this buzz around like, new me, new, you know, whatever. New resolutions. And those are all great and all, but I feel like oftentimes the expectation is to have goals or to have aspirations that are, you know, very grand and that require a lot of work and that are going to require a ton of labor on your part.  And it's almost like there's this underlying thought or belief that the only goals worth achieving or the only goals, perhaps, worth even having are those that require that you work yourself to the bone. And, um, I'm not about that life.

I don't know about you, but while I appreciate a good hustle, I don't believe in, and I am not a proponent of, hustle culture as it relates to running a business. And so I chose to take more time off. I wanted to have more time off from my business as one of those goals that I have for myself here inside of the new year. So why did that even come up? Why did I choose that? Well, it all comes down to relaxation.  While I was journaling around my own intentions for the 2021 year, I wrote for myself:

"I'd like to build more time for self-sustenance and self-celebration into my business in 2021. I would love to build a sabbatical type of schedule into my business and be able to implement it without feeling stress around stepping away from my work."

And when I wrote those things in my journal, my thought was, "I really I've worked so hard. I worked so hard to reach certain milestones and to create a certain experience for myself, for my family, and for those clients who I serve, but also, in having all of that done at what point in time am I making time and space for myself to be able to appreciate and really enjoy the fruits of that labor?"

 For me, this year brings in the decade, officially, of being in business and I am very, very aware of how little I have prioritized relaxation. I encourage self-care, obviously, for my clients and even for my students inside of my programs. Certainly, every time I chat with any of my mentees or any of these, you know, business owners who I'm supporting, I always ask about self-care and I always encourage them to take actions that are going to allow for them to really, you know, have that self-sustenance and to have that time for themselves and to lean into relaxation. And at the same time, I say it and like, it's kind of hard for me. If I'm being honest, it's kind of hard for me to take my own medicine.

As someone who is definitely a self-describing workaholic, I love the work that I do and so it doesn't feel heavy and it doesn't feel hard for me to just keep going. And that's great, but also I find that I'll reach times where I become a little bit resentful, honestly, about not just the work that I'm doing, but even about the success that I'm having, because it's like, what's the point of having the success if I'm not able to really be able to appreciate and to enjoy the fruits of that labor?

And so, for me, I chose to prioritize relaxation as a part of my goals and intentions for 2021. And that all came down to just making sure that I am creating spaces and environments for myself on a regular basis where I can lean into that self-sustenance and into self-celebration, because what's the point of getting the things, right? What's the point of hitting the milestones if you're not even allowing yourself the 5-10 minutes, three days, whatever, to celebrate the thing that you did?  And I just was really tired of allowing myself to fall into that cycle. And so I decided enough's enough. So this year is going to be very different for me in that I want more for myself  And in this case more means 'less'.

So that's kind of the premise. So, it wasn't just the relaxation piece in and of itself underneath, there are some additional kind of issues, or not even issues, there. There's some additional reasoning—right?—that goes into that goal or into that focus. And one of them is work-life harmony, okay?

So, to be clear, I don't believe that it's possible to achieve a true balance in life in business. At least not in the way that we often imagine it, right? There's never going to be a solid 50/50 balance between work and home life. And I'm not willing to measure myself against an unattainable metric. Like, it's not going to happen, but what I can do, however, is I can empower myself to have more harmony by building my business around the lifestyle that I wish to have and not vice-versa. And this is super important.

I—. As I'm, you know, working with my clients, as I'm working with my students, as I'm working with my mentees, often, I like to remind them that you're building a business that you love. I don't want you to build a business that you hate. I don't want you to build a business that feels stressful or that feels overwhelming, or that feels like a burden to you. Now that's not to say that there's not going to be times inside of your business where you're going to have a little bit of a salty phase about maybe a thing that you have to do, right? That's just normal, but you don't want to create a business that becomes so heavy that you have to bend your life around it, because if that's what you're doing, then what's the point, right? Part of why we choose to go into business for ourselves and part of why we have this undertaking is so that we can have the freedom to do the things that we want so that we can have the freedom to, you know, to take off when we want to or to buy that thing, right? We want to have autonomy and we want to have agency and owning a business as part of that, right?

And so, for me, in order for me to be able to implement more work-life harmony, I wanted to— going into this new year, especially—be very clear and very tactical about how I was going to structure my business around the lifestyle that I want and not build my business and then try to fit my lifestyle in around that, because that just doesn't make sense and it doesn't work out in the long run. It just won't.

So, the other piece, and this is like the other side of the coin, right? The other reason here underneath my want for more relaxation in this year is resistance. So, one of the reasons why I personally choose to undertake the experience of owning my own business is the legacy that doing so allows for me to create, right? And I want to use my legacy to change the culture of overworked and underappreciated women. That is huge for me. And particularly as a black woman, I am acutely aware of the quiet, but pervasive expectation of me to work myself to the bone. And there is, I mean, there is a long, and frankly disgusting, legacy in American history and culture that places an expectation on women, and especially on women of color, to be more, to do more and to do so without any rest or reprieve. And I want my legacy to serve as a direct contradiction of that tiresome rhetoric, so I'm choosing to prioritize relaxation alongside my revenue as an act of resistance.

Our society does not typically make space for, or at least comfortably make space, for women, and definitely not women of color to, one, revel in having a solid income, right? Like, if you as a woman, or again, especially as a woman of color, step into a room and are clear about financially how well you are doing, you are immediately met with thoughts, uh, with opinions, and you're— basically, you're asked to shrink.  You're asked to be small, um, to make yourself small, and to quiet down over there, right? It's not appropriate.  And at the  same time you're, you know, money aside, there is this expectation of 'you will work'.

I mean, literally, our nation, here in the US, our nation was built on the backs of black people, black women, without pay. And there is still this expectation of women of color, specifically, to continuously deliver, deliver, deliver, and get nothing in return or get very little in return and certainly not to take rest. Certainly not that. And so, for me, part of the legacy that I'm hoping to build for my family and for my community is one that says, "no, no, no, no, no, it doesn't have to be that way. And I won't allow it to be that way. And I'm unwilling to continue to allow for that rhetoric to define what my life experience is."

And so, not only do I—. Obviously, I have my revenue goals for my business. Obviously I, you know, want to do well and wish to do well and have my strategies and such in place for my business to do well from a revenue perspective. But I don't want that to be the only meter stick by which I'm measuring my success. It says:

"I also want to create a culture for myself, for my household, for my community, that says you can get this money and you can take a break. You can get this money and you can go on vacation. You can get this money and you don't have to kill yourself to do it."

And I don't think that there is enough conversation about that. And definitely not in our industry. There's not enough conversation around: you get to have both and you can have both.

There has been a longstanding rhetoric inside of the henna industry, specifically, that there's this feast or famine.  You have to go get the money while you can. When it's festival season it's like: you have to be out there in the streets and you have to be doing XYZ. And if you don't then, you know, you're just going to miss out.

I don't believe in any of that. And I've harped on that piece for a very long time and it wasn't until the— it wasn't until the pandemic that people started to pay me a little bit of mind on that point. But I'm like, there is no law that says in order to be successful as a henna artist, you have to work yourself to the bone. That's the only way that you're going to make bank. Absolutely not.

I've made it no secret that inside of my own business I work part-time hours with my clients. I work in the evenings and then I work Saturdays. So, normally, in the morning, I'll work at the henna boutique. On Saturdays and in the evening, that's when I go and I service private parties or private events.

Typically, I've maintained for myself a schedule where Sunday and Monday I'm off. I don't see clients. I work a 5-day workweek, and I work part-time, and I make bank doing it. And I want to take that a step further this year because even with that, um, even allowing for myself to have that sort of schedule—which don't get me wrong, that's been an excellent schedule up until now— I also am now reaching a place where, you know, my kids are getting a little bit older. At the time of this recording, my kids are ,4, 6, and 11. And so my kids are getting a little bit older. They're able to appreciate more experiences that I can provide them, right? They're a little bit more cognizant of the things that are going on around them.

And so just as an example, you know, last fall when things were, they just started to reopen, you know, again after the lockdowns and so forth with Corona, you know, with Coronavirus. I went to work, you know, I went back to work. I reopened the boutique. I started working again with clients and I did get kind of swept up in this whirlwind of: well, I need to see as many clients as I possibly can because if a lockdown comes again. Like I don't want to be out. So there was this feeling of 'I need to strike while the iron's hot'.

And at the same time that costs me something. What happened? What did that cost me? Last fall was also my daughter, my middle daughter, my six-year-old's  first year playing soccer. And we were, um, we weren't sure, actually, if she was going to be able to play, um, or my son, my eldest, this was like, his third year playing. And we weren't sure if the kids were going to be able to play soccer because, uh, obviously of the pandemic, there was a lot of back and forth about whether it was going to be safe or not. And if the community was going to allow for the soccer, you know, thing, to happen. And so when they did, and they, you know, allowed for us to have our outdoor games and so forth, I was so excited. And also, I went to one.

Like, I—, because the practices are during a time that I typically am at the henna boutique, I wasn't able to make it to the practices. I never got to attend one of my son's practices last season. I felt horrible about that. And don't get me wrong, I am not a soccer mom. I do not, um, from like an experience perspective, I am not hype about going to soccer practice.  It's not something that I enjoy. Honestly, I probably would prefer to be just about anywhere else. And I definitely, you know, just being frank, I would prefer to be at work, but... and listen, judge me if you want, but that's just keeping it real, right? That's just me being a real-life mom, okay?

However, I recognize what my being there means to my kid, right? And in this year, this season, my kids — two of them. And so it really, it cost me something to not make it to any of my son's practices. I was able to attend one game for him and for my daughter, I didn't see her play a game at all. Like, I—. For her, I was able to attend, I think, two practices over the length of the entire season and I didn't actually ever see her play and that meant something to me. And while I was experiencing that, I also was very, very critical of myself.

And I said, at that point, that I will never forget the day that she had the final game, her final game and she got her trophy and she got her metal, you know, and she was so happy. And she made a goal! She was so happy. And I missed that. And I'll never forget how I felt hearing about, you know, this amazing day that she had. And knowing that I was at work. I was at work and I missed it. I do not go through what I go through and I do not work as hard as I do in my business in order to miss things like that.

And I, at that point, said: I'm going to draw a line. I'm going to draw a line. Next year will not be the same. I will not miss those things. I have to keep my actions aligned with my values, period.

And so for me, choosing to prioritize time off, doesn't just speak to relaxing for me, which that is important, but that's a piece. There's also, again, the work-life piece. I want to be able to be present. I want to be able to balance. I want to be able to juggle. I want to be able to address both the work and the home piece without feeling like I'm falling short of the things. And I want to do it in a way that feels good to me. And that really feels authentic. And that is aligned with those values that I have. And I want to resist this, you know, this rhetoric that you have to work yourself to the bone in order to be successful. I'm not willing to do it. Part of the legacy that I hope to leave for my own children is one where they saw their mother create this amazing thing with nothing more than her hands and her wit and her desire to create a lifestyle for them that was beyond what was available for her. And I want them to see that you can do that and you can be present and you can be, you know, available and you can have the time and the connection with your family or with whatever things are important to you, right? That is what I want my children to see.

And so that's part of why I, you know, I'm choosing to prioritize taking that time away. Taking that time away from my business. And so I, you know, after sharing that, I hope that it inspires you. I hope that it motivates you. And I hope that it also gives you like, some really candid insight to what it is when you do reach that place of success, perhaps, you know, inside of your business where you have to make choices. I am choosing to prioritize my value. And my values say that I want to embody my legacy by way of these tenets.

So what does this look like? I did, just as I'd written for myself in my journal, I did go in and I created my calendar for 2021. I made a plan where every 6 to 8 weeks I have a break. And that break looks like somewhere, depending on when in the year, a 7 to 10 day break away from my work. I am not available on those days, period. Those are days that will be spent either alone or with my family, or, you know, doing the things that are important to me as an individual and not solely, you know, through the lens of 'How can I grow my business?', 'How can I do...' No, no, no.

I firmly, firmly believe that in order to accelerate, you have to first slow down. And so allowing myself the space to slow down and to refill and to recharge and to allow myself to celebrate everything that I do in those weeks between my time off, right? That's going to allow me to approach my business, and to approach my life, with more availability, more capacity, right? More capacity to do those things that are going to propel me forward when I'm on, but first I need that time off, okay?

So, I want to ask: what things are you prioritizing this new year? Perhaps, I mean, perhaps it's something like what I have or perhaps it's something totally different. I don't know. I'd love it though if you'd share it with me. You can join me, hop over into the Hennapreneur Community at Hennapreneur.com/ community and join in on the conversation. I'd love to hear what things you're prioritizing in this new year. And if there's any way that I can support you or that the community can support you, let us know, right? Alright, with that I'll let you go and I'll see you next time!

I've got a serious question for you:  are you ready to stop playing small with your art and to take your business to the next level?

 Are you tired of feeling like you're doing it all to grow your business, but you just aren't seeing the results and the success that you're looking for?

Perhaps you've got clients here and there, but you know inside that your potential expands far beyond what your business is generating today. You may know that you're a solid artist, but you can't seem to crack the code on the business side of things, and you may find yourself wondering, "What gives?!"

If any of this sounds like you: Listen up! Because I've got some really great news for you.

I've got a free, on-demand masterclass called 5-Figure Foundations where I'll teach you my framework for how to build a profitable henna business. During the masterclass you'll learn how to position your henna business for success -- even if you don't have any background in practical business management. You're going to learn the critical steps you need to take in order to get your budding business started off right or to correct the broken one that's burning you out.  You're going to learn why you need systems, not feelings, to make more money and to expand your business. We're going to get real clear, real fast about how you're likely getting in your own way right now, and how you can remove the frustrations that are holding you back.

I'm also going to share my tried and true framework for establishing a profitable, sustainable business, and I'm going to tell you all about how my students are continuing to grow their businesses and celebrating some pretty big wins in the process, even through those everyday challenges that you might expect, like juggling work and home life, and even those massive challenges that you might've never seen coming, like navigating a pandemic while being a business owner.

At the end of the masterclass, you'll no longer be in the dark. You'll know exactly what to do and what to avoid, to build a solid foundation for your own profitable henna business. To register for the masterclass and to watch it instantly on demand, visit Hennapreneur.com/foundations.